Jealousy is normal – how you handle it is what’s ruining your relationships!
Has jealousy ever caused a huge argument in your dating life? For some, it’s the reason for many breakups. But jealousy is normal. It’s an emotion that comes as goes like joy, grief and excitement. It’s how people handle jealousy that’s ruining their relationship!
There’s no secret formula or special affirmation that you can use to eliminate jealousy. The best you can do it change your relationship with jealousy. See it as any other human emotion which will pass.
Now, if jealousy comes because you see your partner blatantly disrespecting you by flirting or sexting someone outside the relationship – that’s something else entirely.
But when jealousy springs from seemingly nowhere, here are a few things you can do:
- Look at old texts from your partner to remind yourself of all the ways your partner has said, “I care about you.”
- Reach out to a trusted wise friend about these feelings. Not so they can talk you out of them, but so you can share this moment and be reminded “it happens to all of us.”
- Remember jealousy comes and goes and that this uncomfortable feeling will be over soon.
- Turn to self-soothing practices that bring you a sense of security.
- Remember the difference between jealous feelings vs. jealous behaviors. Do not act on your jealousy. This could cause drama where there is none!
The point isn’t to eliminate jealousy (that will never happen). The point is to normalize it like we do pain, anger and excitement. Create a better relationship with jealousy, let it come up and find ways to soothe yourself back into a sense of security.
Accusing our partners, create delusions and acting out will only push your partner away – which is the exact opposite of what you want at the moment. Be honest when jealousy comes up so that you and your partner can mutually problem solve. That way they can help you with these feelings and it may bring up an opportunity for them to admit they experience jealousy as well! Transparency and vulnerability is a beautiful thing!
An emotionally intelligent partner will know feelings of jealousy are normal. So long as you all talk about the feelings that arise, and don’t succumb to accusations and childish behavior – jealousy is something that is manageable.
Don’t let something as impermanent as jealousy ruin a perfectly stable relationship!
by Michaé Baisden
Check out my new website Mingle City and join The Michael Baisden Travel Club. Read updated news articles, watch live streaming content and stay up to date on what’s going on! www.minglecity.com
And go to Amazon.com http://amzn.to/2xdqEQp and read one of my 7 books. My latest book it titled, Woman Up! But my fatal attraction thriller, God’s Gift To Woman, is my favorite. Make sure to purchase the Collectors Editions or Special Editions of my novels. Those versions have the updates
If You Want To Be “The Man” Then Lead! By Michael Baisden
Nothing turns a woman on more than seeing her man confidently walk into a room and handle his business! Whether it’s fixing a flat tire, dealing with a bully at his child’s school, or negotiating a business deal, a woman needs to know her man can take charge of a situation and get things done.
When she tells him what the problem is she expects him to listen, formulate a plan of action and then execute it. And she doesn’t want to go back and forth explaining the problem over and over again. The only three words she wants to hear from him is, “I got it!”
And it’s not just a matter of it getting done, but in what manner? Yes, it’s admirable that a man says he will repair the leaky roof but how long does it take him to get around to it? In a woman’s mind being a leader means getting things done now—not four or five days after she tells you. At some point her attitude will be, “To hell with it, I’ll do it myself.”
As time passes, she will bypass his lazy attitude and resolve the problem on her own. As I always say, relationships are businesses too and women understand that better than men. The children have to be fed, homework has to be done, bills have to be paid, clothes must be washed, and college and retirement plans don’t make themselves. If a woman has to take the lead in managing all these things and more, why are we shocked when she begins to say to herself, “What the hell do I need a man for?” and “I can do bad all by myself.”
The misconception most men have about women is that they are only interested in being in love; romantically speaking that may be true. But as women mature, the euphoria of being in love must be balanced with a sense of security.
Women need to feel secure before they can completely surrender themselves to the relationship and they must continue to feel secure in order to have confidence in the man’s ability to lead. And that security isn’t something that can be given one day and taken away the next. If a man can’t be counted on to be consistent, then he isn’t worthy of leadership.
~ Michael Baisden
Visit the homepage of www.Minglecity.com and Join The Michael Baisden Travel Club. And go to Amazon.com http://amzn.to/2xdqEQp and download one of my 7 books. My latest is, Woman Up! You Decide Your Life, What To Put Up With And When To Move On! My personal favorite is the ‘Fatal Attraction’ thriller, God’s Gift To Women. Make sure to purchase the Collectors Editions or Special Editions of my novels. Those versions have the updates.
For relationship advice, podcasts, videos and to read more articles and excerpts from my books, visit MingleCity.com/articles