How Many People Are In An Open Relationship And Don’t Know It? By Michael Baisden.
I don’t believe every man cheats but I do think the vast majority will at some point during their relationship, and so will most women. If we can agree with that assessment then we can move forward and stop approaching relationships with blinders on, doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result. We all know the definition of insanity, right?
Let’s face it, most relationships are open anyway. People either don’t know it, or they are in denial. How many times have we ignored our partners being inconsistent, emotionally, sexually and with regards to their availability? We know something is going on, or at least something is off, but we let it slide. Women are unfaithful too and at some point, we have to confront the issues of other people being a factor. Not in all relationships but most.
And if women are going to tolerate their man being involved with other women then they should reserve the same option to see other men, if they choose to. Every statistic about infidelity shows that over 70% of men have cheated once and over 50% of women. Why are we afraid to tackle an issue that’s staring us right in the face?
Besides, ladies, not having the open relationship talk is to the man’s advantage and the woman’s disadvantage. Why? Because men know that if a woman is into him sexually and emotionally, she most likely won’t desire sex with other men. Again, I’m saying in most cases. It’s not either of our duty in the relationship to restrict what our partners really want to do.
And let’s keep it even more real, women who are honest with themselves know that most men will exercise that option whether the woman agrees to it or not. It’s not until men are faced with the possibility that their woman will possibly be having sex with other men that the reality of what they are asking the woman to put up with becomes real. As long as the benefits flow one way the man is never truly challenged with what the woman is experiencing emotionally.
Let me be clear, I’m not condoning cheating or having an open relationship. What I am promoting is open and honest communication. Sometimes people just think they want an open relationship, that is until they realize it’s open to both ends. That’s when shit gets real!
~ Michael Baisden
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Sometimes You Just Want To Say, F**k Love, By Michael Baisden
Sometimes You Just Want To Say, F**k Love, By Michael Baisden
Of course, I believe in love! I’ve been in love a few times in my life and for the most part, it was a great experience! But it’s also true that some of the biggest mistakes I have made were because of love!
It’s not that love blinds you, which it often does, but loves causes you to compromise on things that you don’t realize until later…that you should not have.
You don’t necessarily lower your standards, but we do tend to dismiss them because of how euphoric love is. We trip over the emotions of love, the chemistry of love, and the finality that the search is over for The One! We’re all programmed to desire that Hollywood love kinda shit.
When you’re young you can afford to love unconditionally but when you’re older and have more to lose in terms of time and financial stability you understand exactly what I mean by Fuck Love!
Fuck being vulnerable to someone who is inconsistent! Fuck making life plans with people you are not truly compatible with. And fuck investing energy into someone just because the sex is great, and people say you look good together.
There’s too much at risk to get carried away by love. Love cannot be THE most important factor in choosing a partner when you’re grown; character can, integrity can, compatibility can, shared values, lifestyle, and attitudes about money! As well as kindness and loyalty!
I know some will argue that a combination of those qualities can cause you to love someone, and I agree. But too often we give Love too freely instead of insisting on a consistent demonstration of character.
So maybe I shouldn’t be too hard on love and instead say, Fuck falling in love! Let’s grow to love! It may not be as romantic, but it will be more authentic and longer-lasting!
Michael Baisden
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