Are You Having “Rona” Nightmares Too? By Michael Baisden
It was after sundown and I was driving around Los Angeles. The streets were empty, all the stores were closed, even the grocery stores. I nervously drove around hoping to find something to eat. I turned a corner and suddenly people were everywhere! Groups of teenagers, families, kids, just hundreds of people all piling into this walking into this building that looked like a museum, it was a big party!
As I drove my car up an incline, I became enraged watching all these people acting as if the pandemic wasn’t happening! I leaped from my car, without putting it into park, and began scolding people. My car started rolling slowly downhill as I screamed at people trying to convince them to go home.
I came across a white family, a man, his wife, and two young children, a boy and a girl. I shouted at them as they rushed towards the entrance of the building, “Why are you out here? This virus is going to kill you!” The whole family stopped in their tracks and began verbally attacking me, “Mind your own damned business!”
They turned and continued to walk towards the building. Suddenly, the little boy, who was about 13, turns and rushed towards me. He pulls a gun out of his backpack and begins to yell curse words at me! I don’t recall what he was saying but it was racial.
Everyone around us froze and began ducking behind cars. The father rushes over and grabs the gun from his hand. I yell, “Why does a kid have a gun in his backpack? The father continues to yell at me with the gun in his hand while directing his son to go over to his who was standing on the sidewalk some 20 feet away. Now, this is what it gets weird.
Being in LA, of course, there are celebrities walking around. So who do I see coming down the incline across the street? Steven Seagal. And yes, he’s still wearing that damned ponytail. I yell for him to come over and assist me and he does.
While the father’s head is turned yelling at his son to go back to his mother, Steven walks over and sees the gun in the guy’s hand and reaches for it. The father quickly turns and throws a punch that lands squarely on Steve Seagal’s jaw. Realizing that he just hit Steven Segal the man starts apologizing profusely! But he’s still holding the gun.
Steven knocked the shit out of him. The man continues to apologize, “I said I was sorry, goddammit! The gun is not even loaded, see!” He points his finger at the butt of the gun wear the clip for the bullets was clearly missing. Then he points the gun at my head and pulls the trigger. But he doesn’t realize there’s a bullet still in the chamber. The gun goes off, bang! Hitting me on the temple. I go down.
To make a long story short, I recovered with some mild brain damage. The man gets off with a six years sentence for involuntary manslaughter, which was reduced to 3 years home arrest because he was well connected and had a relationship with the judge.
Don’t ask me what the moral of the story is or what happened to Steven Seagal, I just need these crazy-ass dreams to stop! So, what did you dream about?
~ Michael Baisden