I Need Help: Parents with kids going down the wrong path

Are your kids out of control? What are they doing?

Do you need help with them?

* Young offenders transferred to the adult system are later arrested for violent and other crimes 34 percent more frequently.
* A combination of nature and nurture may make some children more likely to develop behavioral problems, new research suggests.

Need help? Visit these sites:
--Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention
--Types of delinquency prevention programs
--Juvenile Awareness Program in NJ

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Comment by Quentin Lowe on March 11, 2009 at 8:21pm
Hello Mr. Baisden!! Was listening to your show today and I wanted to inform your listeners of a great program. The Purple Boot Initiative is a mentoring program that provide mentors to redirect the mind set of today’s young men by building sound character, business acumen, exposure, etiquette, and literacy. The Purple Boot Initiative is currently operating in Harlem, NY and has plans to expand to Maryland. Mr. Etu Evans is the founder. Mr. Evans believes that “When we raise the level of expectation, resources, and exposure of our boys, suddenly the impossible becomes the expected. I was one of these boys! Education is a passport to success, and perceptions are combustible. Images have power and are measurable influences that precipitate social behavior.” Since its inception in Harlem, The Purple Boot Initiative has already increased the academic and behavioral performance of its mentees by over 50% in just 11 months. For further information you can visit www.etuevans.net or contact Quentin Lowe at (301) 257-2378 or email at qblowe@msn.com.
Comment by Sonice on March 11, 2009 at 7:07pm
I'm the mother of 2 boys and 1 girl and I had my children in program called Young Men and Women For Change (YMWFC) in Toledo, Shawn Mahone(567*277*5352) is the founder. I've seen great improvement with my children, one of his goals with our children is to reduce the dropout rate and help our young people recognize and improve their unacceptable behavior. He is currently working in some of Toledo's school to help keep our children IN school and not at home on suspension.
Comment by Platinum Dreamz on March 11, 2009 at 7:06pm
I am also a single parent of two kids, a 13 year old son and 14 year old daughter, where neither one of my children's fathers are in their lives full time. My son has now gotten to the stage of wanting to be a thug, acting out and getting in trouble with the law. He is a very good athlete and makes good grades in school, so I can't really figure out what went wrong. He has mentors as far as his teachers, coaches, pastor and friends. Right now, I may be wrong, but I'm giving him a taste of hard love. We are about to go to court for the trouble he put upon himself and I will be by his side, but I am not going to be the parent that is going to beg the judge to keep him out of jail. Maybe if gets a taste of being locked up without his freedom of being with the family, playing basketball and Playstation all day, he will have a change of attitude. Maybe I'm wrong but if I'm always there to bail him out everytime he gets into trouble, I feel like he will continue in that pathway. Where I live there is no boys and girls club, girl scouts or any of that to keep them occupied and that's one of the reasons I would actually like to start a non-profit organization that tends to the needs of the kids. Actually set up a mentoring program where they can have access to someone with just a phone call or a drive away. I would like them to be in a place to where they realize that they aren't the only ones that feel like this and develop and make new, positive friendships. If anyone out there can help me establish this and get the ball moving, please contact me asap. Because in life, experience is the best teacher!!!!
Comment by Natasha on March 11, 2009 at 6:51pm
Many parents try their best and then there is the other parents who give their children everything under the sun and when your child see that they wonder why cant i but i let my children know why they cannot get those things. In our country children wear uniform from nursery school to college and you cannot have your nails passing your flesh orelse your finger were in big trouble. Here in this country girls are going with long design nails and the boys with his pants waist to his knees. Micheal you are correct parents need to take care of how what where and when with their children.
Comment by Joy on March 11, 2009 at 10:07am
Cassie, I hope you read this. I agree with you to a certain extent. However we need to take it a step further, or back I should say. How about we as women start being more responsible about who we have UN-protected sex with. No babies are not created through osmosis, they are created when a man and woman decide to do the grown up with no form of birth control. A guy may be cool for a "good time" , but that doesn't mean he'll be a good father or a father at all for that matter. A lot of times women are well aware of what type of man they are dealing with prior to getting pregnant by him. He doesn't have a job, already had other kids, no education but yet and still that woman will have unprotected sex with him, get pregnant and then wanna act surprised when dude bounces! C'MON LADIES!!! Yes it takes two to make baby, and yes the man should always step up and be father if he gets a woman pregnant. But only the female has to carry that baby, and only the female HAS to take care of that child once he/she is born. The guy could always just leave, and obvously that is the road most taken by men these days. Ladies protect yourself and your unborn child. Stop sleeping with lowlife men, and if you do, use some form of birth control!
Comment by Lady Dee on March 11, 2009 at 1:03am
Hello Mr. Baisden. I'm a single mother of three(3), ages 19,15 and 9. The 15 and 9 yr old are boys. Their father is currently in prison and we recently got divorce(2/08). The reason for the divorce is that their father can't stay out of the prison system. My boys are not trouble makers. They are good kids, however they can be easily taken advantage of. My 15 year old washes cars to help me out as much as he can, but I am scared that most of his customers are alcholics or even smokers. I try stay on him, however it's hard being the father and mother trying to steer them in the right direction. I have gone to different organizations for mentor help, however, I always get the same answer, we don't have any male mentors at the moment. Please help raise my boys to be successful like you and George. Desperately seeking in Florida.
Comment by Tee Dixon on March 11, 2009 at 12:42am
I have a 15-yr. old nephew who needs some direction in life due to the absence of a father and other male role models in the family. I would like to know if anyone out there knows of any positive groups, leaderships, or anything that we can reach out to for assistance in the 29223 area of South Carolina. I am patiently awaiting some feedback.

Comment by carmen bauknight on March 10, 2009 at 11:48pm
it starts at a very young age(dicipline)
Comment by Elaine on March 10, 2009 at 11:18pm
Shunteria, Congraatulations on going to school. Try getting everyone together for a study session, even though you will be working on different levels, this will show you boys that you are committed and maybe give them incentive to contiue on after HS. HOwever, be patient when you are interrupted to help them.

As far as keeping them focus, try getting them invovled in Boy Scouts, church organizations, have them mentor younger students in a subject they are good at. They can be a positive role model for them. It will let others children with limited male role models that he can suceed.

As for my children, they have been a Girls Scout for eight years. It may not be cool but they learn a lot. Another positive involvement is working in the Children's Ministry at church. They help in the classrooms teaching younger children God's word. finally, my youngest just got invovled with horses. She has to feed and exercise the horses, clean up poop, help build a barn, give lessons to student, some mentally challenged and work parties. It's hard work but she is very committ and loves it.

Oh, their Dad is not present physically but speaks with them everyday to make sure he can keep them harboring hard feeling about me. Always speak postive about your childrens' father no matter what when the boys are present. This will also help them foster a bette love for you.
Comment by Shannette Archer on March 10, 2009 at 11:15pm
It is so sad because one mistake that a child makes that leads them into Juvenile Detention can label them for the rest of their life.

We as parents have to start setting example for our kids. I know a lot of us women didn't know much about parenting when we had our kids because we were just kids ourselves (young and imature) but at some point in our lives we have to grow up and take responsibilities for our actions.
Women!....we have a tendency to keep waiting on that father that is not in the picture, as hard as it is we have to move on and focus on our children future.
If you are like me and do not want your girls to grow up experiencing the same hardships and disappointments, put your foot down now.


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